betrayed

“I want our blog to be more of a reflection of who we really are.” he says this to me this morning. Of course when he says this, he means he wants us to focus on the positives more and really make our life a reflection of what the blog is.

But we are flesh and blood. We are a living breathing couple. There is much that happens behind closed doors. I no longer wish to hide behind who we really are. We are flesh and blood just like you. We have problems, we have tears, we share laughter, we share love, we have pain.

The world of blogging is a world of secrets. I am surrounded by blogs written by people unhappy in their own marriages. Some blogs are a cry for something more… their hidden, forsaken desires get written down as a way to deal with the pain of not being able to express themselves. Though I have never worn a jewel on my left hand, my first blog, under different name, was exactly that. My hidden desires, my screams of attention to my boyfriend were all written there for him to see. What I lacked in my real life, got written down as a form of therapy for myself. It later consumed me… and I was able to end things, delete who I was and become the living breathing creature that I am today.

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